Happy Birthday!

On Thursday April 15, I woke up as usual... with a pain in my butt. Literally. I was scheduled for a steroid epidural injection shortly after we put Mr. Hayden on the bus that morning. Though I am not a fan of pain or needles, I was determined to do anything to feel better, and make it to my son's birthday party in just 2 days time.
So the simple procedure was a success, minus the numb feeling in my legs and bottom. I was told no stretches for twenty-four hours. You got it!
Come Saturday, I wouldn't say I felt like a new woman, but I definitely felt better. I walked about Hayden's party (held at a pizza like arcade called Rinkside), talking, handing out tokens, and admiring the kids. Eventually my legs said "Take a break lady!" and I obliged. Overall... the party was a success and Hayden was happy. That's all that mattered.

Now... I'm at a fork in the road. Maybe I took advantage and moved around too much, too much sitting or driving. Maybe one cortisone/steroid shot isn't enough, because I've regressed. I never left my good old friend the couch and bed for long -  and they seem to be glad I'm back. Me on the other hand, want to chuck them out the window in a fit of anger. But if I did that, who knows what body part I'd hurt next. ;)
Either way, we're in the waiting game. Michael has been extremely busy with work, grocery shopping, cleaning, and cooking. If we aren't neglecting one thing, we are another. Just recently we got a warning about our fence... which is falling apart. With every intention to take it down, we are now forced to do this before we face a fine - by May 3rd. When we (or shall I say Michael) will find time to do this is beyond our imagination. Yet we keep chugging along...

Hayden had a fantastic birthday. We took plenty of pictures of his big day - him turning 7! Check out the Daily V's on the right. He got his beloved Nintendo DS and some games, in addition to some Bakugan toys. We are also grateful for the donations to Hayden's summer theater camp. He had such a blast last year. Swimming, dancing, and singing, OH MY!

Lots of great things are happening in Hayden-ville: Hayden's biking skills are coming along awesomely. He rode from two neighbor houses down - to our house all by himself. A tremendous feat and an accomplishment for our big guy!
He's conquered shoe tying "Mommy's" way, as long as he takes his time and the laces are a decent size.
Hayden's teacher came back from a medical family leave - which meant cleaning out desks and bringing home weeks old papers. One included a worksheet from St. Patty's Day titled "My 3 Wishes". Hayden wrote very nice and neat his three wishes, 1. to be speed racer's car. 2. a baby toy for his baby sister. 3. a baby bottle for his baby sister. Michael and I were soo touched by our loving and thoughtful boy!

We are still awaiting news on Baby V, and will be sure to post when we hear something. But I wouldn't doubt you'll hear me shouting from the rooftops when the time finally comes. ;) In a blink of an eye we have been going through this process for 2 years (But no cake for you!). We can't wait to meet her and bring her home.

Enjoy the rest of your weekend! 0 comments

Posted by Mel at 10:34 AM

Have a Snack While You Wait...

Monday I had an uplifting conversation with our adoption coordinator. We are going to be assigned our orphanage and given travel dates soon. With that, a flood of questions came. One of them being that we could potentially be traveling as early as the middle to end of May. With all that has been going on with my injury, this news has us "tickled pink".

One of those questions included how... how do we travel if the "boys" are still in school? And how long? We are going to do our best to make it to Kazakhstan in one trip (which we hope will be about three to three and half weeks). And we are asking to have an escort bring Baby V home. Of course... now we seriously have to get our butts in gear, paint and finish her room, and buy girlie things!!!! *That's one of the fun parts!* Unfortunately, since we are looking to adopt a toddler girl between the ages of 12-24 months, clothes sizes vary widely. So that will have to be put off until we come back from our trip and we have met our daughter.

In other news, I am still waiting to hear back about my MRI. My doctors office decided to take a little Easter vacation, and left me in a lurch. Nice, huh? Meanwhile, I am still recovering, doing my stretches and venturing to therapy twice a week.

Yesterday, Hayden kept himself occupied a good portion of the day with his Vtech kiddy digital camera. He's not only able to take pictures, but quick little videos. One of his videos included him laying at the top of the stairs filming his self singing the theme song to Scooby-Doo. But our most prized video is of him snacking.

Before we know it... it will be May or June and we will be heading to Kazakhstan. We hope to get things in gear soon, and will keep you posted with our progress.

Happy Easter!

1 comments

Posted by Mel at 9:28 AM

Step On A Crack, Break Your Back

Almost 5 Weeks and counting - should be the title of this post. This month has been one of the worst, trying my patience, health, and sanity. All the while... I have had plenty of time to write (though in a horizontal position - it isn't all that easy), think, and make mental notes of nail pops.

March 1, 2010 changed me. Our family's whole routine went out with the garbage (pun IS intended, as you'll read soon) that day, and sometimes... when my patience and frustration gets the better of me - I feel I will never gain control again.

To give you some insight, I have a slipped disk... just by maneuvering the garbage cans on a chilly icy morning. I must have twisted my body the wrong way, and have spent my time since paying for it. I have started physical therapy, but mostly I spend my time abusing my couch and bed. They haven't seen this kind of company in like - EVER! Standing, sitting, and walking (for long periods of time) are painful. Which basically makes daily living dull, boring, and uneventful. I have caught up on more TV shows than I can count, OnDemand shows I never knew existed, and have even watched TV online. I bring new meaning to "couch potato".

Hubby and Hayden have been extremely helpful (or as helpful as an almost 7 year old can/want to be). But it's hard. When you want a snack and you don't quite know what you want... you need to raid your pantry. Or you want to go to the store (so you can find a snack to buy) and use those coupons - the ones you having been clipping for weeks while on the couch! And you hear the birds now, but you would actually like to SEE them. But you just can't do it all.

Don't get me wrong, I have made it out. I manage, or do my best, to make it to Hayden's therapies (though car rides/driving is difficult). I am able to make Hayden's lunch with his help and walk him down to the bus stop. But standing to make a long meal, like dinner, is more challenging. Let's just say I am tired of take-out.

Either way, I have come a long way with my injury. I was on my hands and knees in so much pain I couldn't stand almost 5 weeks ago. I understand the healing process is long and grueling, and sometimes I think it would have been easier had I have broken a wrist, etc. Least I'd be more mobile and could still tend to my family.

This injury has taught me a few things, one being trust. Also I know some things just aren't life threatening, and it's ok to let it go. Who cares if the floor isn't swept and the dishes aren't done. Yes it's annoying, it will get done... eventually.

In other (quick) news, Hayden has learned to tie a dummy-set of shoes, has pedaled 6 cycles on a bike at therapy and came home with three 100% on his tests last week, one including spelling. He is doing so well, his IEP services has dropped O.T. to consult and all that remains is speech. And even speech was lowered. He is so happy, and we are proud of his progress.

Still no word on the adoption front. But we put out an email and hope to hear back soon.

Here's to no more injuries, no more bad fast food (a nasty encounter with raw chicken doesn't do a tummy good), and oh for some warm weather to get some fresh air!

Edit: Needed to change the number of weeks I have been "laid up". Apparently you lose track when all you see is ceiling everyday. That and I never have been good at math. ;) 0 comments

Posted by Mel at 8:36 AM

Happy Mother's Day in Kaz!

While we were hoping for an update this week, it didn't come. Instead we are thinking of the country's 2 day celebration for mothers which starts March 8th. We hope to receive some kind of news once the holiday is over. Until then, Happy Mother's Day to the moms in Kazakhstan!

Meanwhile... I can't wait for this week to end. While running some errands Monday morning for my business, I managed to pull my back out. Though I worked through the morning and early afternoon, I wasn't truly aware of the damage until later in the afternoon when I couldn't rise from the couch. From Monday evening on (and still to this day), I have spent most of my time laying... laying... and catching up on television shows. Not an enjoyable week. My sis and I made an uncomfortable trip out to the doc, got some meds, etc. and was for recommended physical therapy.
If there's anything I have learned from this week - it's two things. One... take it easy when moving the garbage cans, they can ruin your week in a blink. And two... trust. I have had to depend on my family for everything. From something simple like putting on my socks, to walking Hayden to the bus, and even help in the washroom (embarrassingly enough to say). But my husband, mother, brother, and sister were my rocks this week, and without them... I would still be in tears in a fetal position on the floor - in pain.

Here's to a better week, a recovered back... and some good news. ;) 0 comments

Posted by Mel at 8:28 PM

Crossing Our Fingers For An Update...

Photo and video editing at www.OneTrueMedia.com

Video courtesy of http://www.twoheartsforhope.org/
Visit Two Hearts for Hope and learn about what more you can do to help. Donate to the 2 Hearts 2 Kaz Mega Fundraiser and help the children of Kazakhstan. Fund "Project Playground" today, because every little bit helps.
__________________________________________________

News has been slow here. We hope to have an update by the end of the day, but at the latest, next week. We will keep you posted ;)

Hayden has been enjoying school immensely these past few weeks. School has never seemed to be a struggle for him, and we are crossing our fingers that is never the case. However, there are times when things get in the way, i.e. colds and doctor appointments, that forces him to miss his beloved past time. Earlier this week, Hay came down with a fluky bug... keeping him home from school the first 2 days of the week. But once he went back, it was one of the best days he's had all year.

First, Hayden appeared all bright-eyed, smiley, and yelling "Mommy! Guess what!" on Wednesday afternoon upon pickup. Once I got him to quiet down, I saw this odd necklace he was grasping on to for dear life - a tooth necklace. The dangling bottom K-9 tooth finally found its way out, during hot lunch pizza, and Hayden was rewarded with a neat gift. His name was put on the wall in the office, and given a necklace to carry his prize home in.

Later on, driving him to therapy, Hayden entertained me with a tale of at lunch when he felt his tooth fall out, he was thinking and his brain worked out a situation to get that tooth out... without swallowing, or losing any pizza. ;)
We made it to therapy shortly after (I, in stitches from laughing so hard), and Hayden attempted and conquered one of his hardest and scariest tasks from O.T. At the end of the session, we were all very proud of him. He is coming a long way.

On another note, we visited an ENT a few weeks ago. Hayden enjoyed the giant camera that took a picture of his neck, ah... adenoids. We heard word shortly after that his adenoids are enlarged (a concern expressed not only by me, but by therapists). He was given a prescription nose spray, we hope this helps the enlargement, and the fluid in the ear. We go back in the middle of March for another check-up. And unfortunately, if he makes no improvement, surgery is recommended.

Rounding down to our 2 years... we think and dream about what it will be like to have our family together - everyday. Even Hayden, who asks frequently "When will baby sister come home?", is puzzled why this process is taking so long. It's truly a heartbreaking question to answer, but we hope to be able to do that soon. 0 comments

Posted by Mel at 10:27 AM

Once Upon A Time...

Once upon a time there was a man and a woman. They fell in love, married and decided to start a family. What a glorious idea, the Heavens thought... as they blessed this couple with a son almost 2 years after being wed.
The family felt whole - complete, with three cats, a fish, and a frog. But one day... an urge started to rattle their bones. A feeling like something was missing.
It was at that moment - more than two years ago - the Heavens introduced the miracle of adoption to the V family. A sibling, a daughter, a home. Happily Ever After.

We finished up Hayden's B&B play, took a break, and now we're back to business. Hayden continues on being a thespian. He will join the cast of Jungle Book starting next weekend and is excited to "get back to work". A Valentine party at school and a trip to an ENT (recommended by Hayden's speech and O.T. therapists) next week will kick off a busy weekend. Our busy February will turn into a busy March, filled with family bdays (including Daddy's!). Hayden's birthday isn't too far around the corner and is a frequent topic of discussion (mainly from Hayden, LOL).

In adoption speak, we are back to doing paperwork. Yep, you heard me right. One of our forms will be expiring soon, including our fingerprints. With these items needing to be renewed, our homestudy needs to be updated. Which, consequently, means more translating, shipping costs... etc. Yeah fun! We haven't received any word if we've moved up the adoption "food chain". But as always, we'll keep you posted.

B&B moments posted on our "Daily V's" slideshow to the right. Enjoy! 0 comments

Posted by Mel at 9:05 AM

Anxiously Awaiting... Waiting Anxiously...

Last week was a heck of a week. We have dealt with many up's and down's (in the past and present), of which we are proud to say has only made us stronger, and the urge to continue on greater. Preparing to bring our daughter home is no small feat. The process is in no way comparable to buying a car or a house. And like Michael mentioned previously, it's not easy. Though there is nothing in the world that we can compare this experience to, we wouldn't trade it for the world. The end result will by far outweigh... and none of this will matter then.

To help everyone better understand, I (Melissa) have broken down the process of where our dossier is today:

1. Prepare and compile a Dossier and forward to International agency.

2. Dossier is sent to Embassy of Kazakhstan in Washington D.C.

3. Once approved, dossier is sent to "Ministry of Foreign Affairs" (MFA).

4. Then sent to "Ministry of Education" (MOE).

5. Once approved again, dossier is sent to Guardianship Board in the city where you are adopting.

6. Once cleared of step 5. parents are issued a "Letter of Invitation" (LOI).
This letter is necessary for the parents to obtain a Kazakhstani visa. Soon after, parent(s) are allowed to travel to the country and visit, arrange court dates, etc.

The bolded step (#4) is currently where we hope to be standing as of this week. We received word that our dossier was to move on early this week, putting it at the MOE.
Of course, changes can happen at any time. There is no specfic time line in between the steps - thus we have no idea how long it will take officials to go over our paperwork, in addition to other families. This is only an example. :)

Other news that came in last week, we were offered the rare opportunity to adopt 2 sisters, a sibling group. These girls are younger than Hayden, filling in any gap in between ages.
Though it was a very difficult, heart-wrenching decision... we decided a family of five was not in the cards for us at this time. We continue to hold out for one child, a girl, preferably between the ages of 12-24 months. Through all this... we have learned that God will make it happen when it's time.

Hayden's Beauty and the Beast play is this weekend and we couldn't be more thrilled! Besides singing, Hayden has a tiny speaking part that suits him perfectly. We hope to capture it on video, or at the least have plenty of pictures. Though our evenings this week are spent shoveling dinner down our throats, dashing out the door to get him to rehearsal, and then back home to bed ASAP... Hayden is having a blast! We can't wait to show off our little charmer.

Have a great week! 0 comments

Posted by Mel at 11:30 AM

Put Yourself in Someone Else's Shoes

It's nearing the end and we are starting to imagine the day our daughter will be home. What will that day be like? What or how many more obstacles or loopholes will we have to endure to get to that day?

With that in mind, we have no regrets, there isn't a moment that goes by that would make us trade this experience. However, everyday life gets harder and harder. We are constantly hit with questions and problems that are out of our control. Who will watch Hayden while we travel? Should we take Hayden with? Do I (as a mother) feel comfortable leaving him home while we leave and meet our daughter, leaving him in family/friends hands? Why am I told not to worry, but get puzzled looks when asking about the welfare of my son? His life is full too, therapies to help with his developmental delays, fun activities like play, and his love for school. How will he handle mom and dad being gone for several weeks? Do we have all our finances in order? And our paperwork? Yet again, we are faced with expiration dates - papers and fingerprints that need to be re-done.

Yet we rarely hear anyone ask... how are you doing? How are you holding up? This must be hard on you, how are you managing?... Instead we are frequently asked "When?". A question that we don't always know the answer too, a question that most people react like they have opened a can of worms. Or one that people feel that warrants a response like "How come you don't know" then "that's ridiculous!"

And after 20 some odd months, we feel like we are going down this road alone.

We started this blog to help educate our family and friends about the hometown of our daughter while we are there, make them aware of our progress, and share family moments.

So, from this day on... put yourself in our shoes. Imagine how hard it is to want to bring your child home. Imagine how hard you have worked everyday for this for months. How hard it is to explain to your 6 year old who is just as desperate as us why the process takes so long? Or a cashier who your 6 year old just told - that he's getting a baby sister (and your not pregnant). Imagine that yearning to finish the child's room, without a child to fill it. Imagine having no one understand how hard of a process this is, and dealing with that day after day. I (Michael) was just asked by one of my former students who is doing her research paper on International Adoptions as she has a close relative also working through the process, "What was the easiest part of the process?" It took me a really long time to think of a response...made me realize "they" don't make it easy, not one darn thing! Her next question was what would I change...now that I could easily answer and went on and on and on. She said her relative pretty much said the exact same things as me. And it's really frustrating, but we know in end it will all be worth it when we finally bring our daughter into our lives.

Yes, life is hard, we manage. We have good days and bad. We try to keep our heads up. We try to empathize with others, so why can't others empathize with us? For example, while calling a bank that took away our last loan that we needed to finish the process, a loan that is for people who are adopting, the customer service rep felt horrible, yet it was out of her control. The bank made the decision to pull this type of loan and didn't care if we still needed the rest of the money. I could hear the sympathy in her voice, she wanted to help, but the computer was in charge.

This is the first blog entry we have collaborated on, sharing our feelings to those who read. 4 comments

Posted by Mel at 2:01 PM

Jeans Like Swiss Cheese

We had a terrific Christmas! The snow held off long enough to make the journeys out to our family's homes. Hayden enjoyed opening his gifts, in addition to his favorite one being a piano. We are lucky to have a musically inclined child... i.e. easy on the ears and keys. Though currently, he has found out that the "electronic" keyboard plays drums. Of which he is totally excited about. This is one aspect of the piano that is NOT quiet.

So, we have a treat for you! To show you just how much he is enjoying his gift from Santa... view the video below:



We are anxiously awaiting the summer. Not only because we can't take another ounce of snow, or for school to be over, but for us to meet and bring our daughter home! I have started the research again on the design of her room... anxious to implement my ideas. Imagine brown paint, white furniture, pink curtains, and a tree on the wall... I hope it turns out to be everything I envision and more!

Recently we made a trip to JcPenney. With some holiday bucks and a coupon (from the use of my bargain sites), we turned what could have been an empty-pocketbook into a steal of a deal!
Hayden was in dire need of new jeans. With a growing boy, we couldn't live with re-patching the same knee on the worn out jeans. And he needed to get used to buttons and zippers.
So we bought Daddy a warmer coat for under $25, Mommy a new fashionable scarf, and Hayden 2 pairs of Jeans... leaving the bill a tad over $50. We were psyched... and yet I was dreading the days ahead.

Hayden woke several days later, and I laid out a pair of his new jeans. Dreading the "dressing" part... I simply told Hayden to let me know if he had any trouble, to let me know and I would be glad to help him. He has made great strides lately across the board... and occupational therapy is just one of them. So I wasn't surprised when I heard lots of grunting and yelling coming from down the hall at 6:50am Wednesday morning.
I soon came to aide my sulken boy - only to be shut down (not uncommon). But this time was different. Instead of him telling me no, or running away. He told me "Mommy, you always tell me you want me to do things myself, I want to do my pants on my own."
I continued to watch my boy struggle, yearning to help him, though knowing the best thing to do was watch my boy grow confidence in himself.
A couple minutes later, those pants were buttoned - by himself - the grunting and yelling stopped, and I gave my boy the biggest, proudest hug a mother could give.

Happy 2010!

P.S. Pics updated on right sidebar 0 comments

Posted by Mel at 12:25 PM

A Hard Month, But a Good Month

While I laid awake at 2:30am this morning - trying to get rid of a migraine - I couldn't help but wish this month would be over. I struggled with this thought because I love Christmas, the spirit, the gift of giving, and the decorations - but it just doesn't feel the same as years past.

Somehow this month seems rushed and I feel like time has flown by, like a rug being pulled out from under my feet. Could this feeling be the result of losing my Uncle Dale recently to complications of brain surgery? Most likely. Loss and grief affect people in different ways. But I also look at the spare stocking everyday hanging on our hutch - not on our mantle with the other 3. Last year, I thought our family would be 4, not still 3 at the next Christmas.

But I know I have to live in the now, look toward the future. I know Dale is more comfortable in Heaven, and my Aunt Chris will heal. We hope to travel to Kazakhstan in June or July and make our family 4. Life goes on...

On a happier note... I am one hour away from hopping into the car to volunteer for Hayden's Holiday party. What was I thinking? It's also the boys LAST DAY of school before break. No more quiet time, no more chances to shop without child. I am soooo screwed!

Like usual, we have a knack for finding the "bargain" priced outings. Taking a look at our "Daily V" pics, you can catch a glimpse of our trip to the park districts holiday festival. Hayden got to chat with Santa, sing some holiday songs with a musician (more on that later), and do some other cool activities. We also visited a house by my mom's that totally goes all out for the season. Think $1,000+ electric bill... if you catch my drift. ;) Another "ritual" we do every year that we plan to do next week is drive through the winter wonderland in Vernon Hills. We go during the week as it's cheaper. We grab some hot cocoa (or coffee, in my case) and the camera, and turn on the holiday tunes to return to childhood. Every single light is mystifying.

Back to Hayden and the musician... this will be a moment that Michael and I will remember and cherish forever. The park district hired a musician named Steve Beno (http://stevejams.com), who plays children music. He played some of his songs, some holiday tunes, etc. Of these songs, Steve rocked out some of Hayden's favs including Frosty, and Feliz Navidad. He gave the kids permission to dance and hop around... but towards the end, Hayden ran out of energy. That is until his favorite holiday songs "came on". Once this happened, Hayden hopped "on stage" and started singing along with Steve Beno. They looked like they were singing a duet. Thank goodness I got a new camera a while back and it takes video. Here is the result - listen closely and you can hear Hayden!:

Shopping this year has been a bit "challenging"... but I have utilized all my resources and worn them out! I use Twitter everyday, constantly check my money saving and freebie blogs. The only bargain I can share with you at this moment (without hurting peoples feelings... because it's the thought that counts, not the amount that came out of your pocketbook!)... I spent $5.27 on our 60 photo Christmas cards... shipped. I think that alone deserves a pat on the back - sorry I had to brag ;) .

That's it for now, be sure to come back soon for more holiday pics (think unwrapping presents!). And since I figured out the video option on my camera, expect more short clips. ;)

Happy Holidays! 1 comments

Posted by Mel at 11:50 AM